Endings

They suck. Endings to great vacations, endings to excellent books, but endings to relationships- these are the worst. These are hard endings; there's a blunt, sharp end left. Where you're sitting on the couch watching the Emmy Awards and then, 2 hours later, you're driving home for the last time thinking, 'What just happened in that small space of time?'. I'm teary because I didn't want to let it go. I had so many good memories and experiences with him and I know with certainty that I won't be seeing him like that again. Endings are difficult to see beyond. They blind us a bit to the future, like fog, giving less than a foot of view at a time.

I can see very clearly right now into the past year; I remember every detail and every important event between the two of us but I cannot see past this week for myself. That frightens me to death.